Tag Archive | relaxation is a skill

Relaxation

Another new friend enjoys a perch in the Ancient One

It only took thirty years, but I’m grateful to finally understand that relaxation is a skill that requires cultivation and practice. My particular upbringing (and our culture), for all its privileges, left me midlife in a steady state of constant vigilance and anxiety. Meditation helped open my eyes to a different way to be, and the practice of mindfulness has opened my life to a level of contentment, acceptance, and ease I only dreamed of when I moved here thirty years ago. I still get anxious, but it doesn’t bother me as much; I still feel inclined to control things but I’m not attached to outcomes. Relaxation is so much more complicated than taking a day off and putting up my feet; however, that’s what I did today, and I really enjoyed it.

Garden Buddy brought visiting family over this morning for a short walk to the canyon, and Biko delighted them with a show eating a split tomato.
Afternoon brought cool winds and thick clouds but only a few splatters of rain. Wren and I picked beans, and I consulted with my onion mentor. I was grateful to learn that I can leave these beautiful yellow onions growing in the ground til winter, and the bulbs will keep getting bigger for awhile. I’m sure I’ll use them up before the snow flies, but I’m grateful I don’t have to figure out now how or where to store them.
These red onions are a rare Italian heirloom variety that will also probably keep growing their ‘torpedo’ shape for awhile longer. I pulled three of them today whose tops had bent over, thinking they’re done growing, and will use them in the first batch of salsa this weekend.
I’m going to have to start picking tomatoes before they’re ripe to stay ahead of the birds, and whatever varmint ate half of the perfect tomato I was waiting just one more day to pick. It’s ok. I threw the other half over the fence for the old doe: I was so grateful to see her return to the yarden after a few days away.
I’m grateful for the bounty of color, beauty, taste, and nutrition coming on daily.

Puzzle Season

I’m grateful for Boyz Lunch today: Southern Fried Cabbage with Sausage (Gosar spicy Italian!), caramelized yam spears, and a side salad. Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies for dessert. I’m grateful for a mild day, for Topaz being pretty normal and sticking close to home, for a washing machine, for podcasts, Star Trek Next Generation, 30 Rock, streaming, solar power, vanilla ice cream with maple syrup, and so much more…

I’m grateful for Puzzle Season. I claim a pass to start early. I’m grateful for cultivating the skill of relaxation, and for this gorgeous, bright Liberty puzzle, “A Company of Macaws.”

Relaxing

I’ll admit to a bit of stress this past week since Stellar’s seizure. Actually, watching his decline over the past few months has been stressful, though I’ve been coping well. It’s felt good this weekend to have accomplished some things, and given myself permission to relax. Rocky arrived this morning for a couple of days, and the three of us spent the whole day in the garden. Rocky is recovering from ACL surgery, and Stellar is moving along on his own journey, and I was content to spend the day with them in a shady little corner of the garden reading, writing, and occasionally getting up to do a little work with the plants. I’m grateful for relaxing today.

I’m also grateful for those of you who have expressed concern for Stellar, and for me. Thank you. Please don’t be anxious for us. While he’s now on a path that is ineluctably downhill (from one perspective), he seems to take two steps down and then rebound one. He may be around for a lot longer than I thought last week, and then again, he could go out with another seizure at any moment. This is the searing uncertainty that we all live with when we choose to accompany someone we love through their dying process. The hardest part is when he gets agitated and confused. His vet is coming by tomorrow, and I hope she’ll give me something to help him with that. Meanwhile, rest assured that unless I mention otherwise, he is toodling along at his own pace, and we are both ok with it. I’ll post a special edition of Morning Rounds when he takes his last step and ascends to Doggie Heaven, because that is surely where he will go; or else straight to the realm of enlightened beings, and those two places may just be the same.